Fools be talking nonsense; not us though - The Chaff with Scott Stephenson

Can you believe it? Jan. 3, 2025, already. And what’s the first thing we have to do? Address the lies that have been floating around about The Chaff. Yes, there are whispers, rumours and outright falsehoods being spread by our worst enemies, claiming that we pre-write The Chaff. Pre-write it! As if we’d sit around in some lazy, far-off land crafting columns well in advance and letting the news get stale! Ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous.

 

Let’s get one thing straight, folks: The Chaff is always written as close to the deadline as possible - always. We’re on the ground, in the moment, reporting on the very latest developments that shape our community. We’re plugged in. We’re tuned in. We’re right here, giving you the freshest, most immediate coverage of everything that matters. We don’t sit idly by, waiting for things to unfold at some leisurely pace. No, we’re constantly engaged, processing and responding to every little thing that’s happening around us. From the tiniest whisper in the town hall to the biggest event in the community, we’re on it. We’re getting it out there. So when you hear these ridiculous claims that we’re sitting in some distant past, writing about things that happened forever ago, just know that it’s all lies. Vicious, unfounded lies spread by those who can’t keep up. They just can’t keep up with us. We are the fastest news machine in the business, always right there, always current. If we had a freshly-minted Canadian penny for every time someone tried to spread these deceitful little rumours, we’d have enough to pay for a year’s worth of real hit-harding reporting.

 

Take Blyth’s own Jess Miners-Bromley, for instance. Miners-Bromley, with her flour-dusted apron, is a local hero. She’s making waves not just in Blyth, but all over the place, thanks to her participation in The Greatest Baker competition. We’re talking about how she’s just moved on to the next round. And this is right now. It’s fresh, it’s happening, and we’re on it. We’re not just talking about the past. Miners-Bromley isn’t sitting back thinking about what might have been. She’s making a name for herself, advancing to the next stage, and we’re here, cheering her on every step of the way. Her journey to the crown is only just beginning and we’re absolutely sure she’ll win it all. As things unfold in real-time, we’ll be here to let you know how it’s all going. So while others might suggest that The Chaff only reports on what’s happened in the past, we know one thing for sure: Miners-Bromley is the future of baking.

 

And let’s talk about Steve Coulter. The man, the myth, the legend. Coulter isn’t the type of guy who just steps away. He’s a fixture, a cornerstone of the farm equipment business. And the best part? Coulter’s still out there, day in and day out, doing what he does best. No retirement here, folks. He’s not about to hang up his boots and increase his time on the golf course. We’re telling you this now, as it happens. Coulter will be at McGavin’s for as long as he feels like it and that means he’s going to be working there for a very, very long time.

 

Meanwhile, in North Huron, we’ve been keeping a close eye on the efforts of Gregg Furtney, the current Director of Public Works. Furtney has been working hard to keep the Wingham Town Hall Theatre under control. There’s been a lot of talk about changing the use of the theatre, but Furtney is stepping in and doing everything he can to ensure that the building remains a space for all the wrong reasons. One thing we know for sure is that Furtney will never become the Chief Administrative Officer (CAO) of Minto. Never! We’re as sure of that as we are sure that Dwayne Evans will always be North Huron’s CAO, forever!

 

But let’s circle back to those pesky lies our enemies have been spreading. To those who claim that we pre-write The Chaff, we say this: stop it. The Chaff is as current and as fresh as the morning dew on this summer’s day. We’re on top of it. Right here, right now. We are out here, keeping pace with the world, following the headlines as they happen. And those who say otherwise? They simply don’t have the stamina to keep up with the current events as we do. They don’t understand the work it takes to stay in the moment and report the facts as they happen.

 

So, to the doubters, the gossipers and the naysayers who think they’ve figured us out: take a seat. The Chaff is alive and well, always in the moment, and we’re not going anywhere. So while you’re reading this, just know that we’re on top of it. We’re always on top of it. And we’ll keep giving you the best, freshest, most relevant news around.

 

So, until next week, keep your eyes peeled for all the up-to-the-minute news that only The Chaff can bring you. And don’t believe the lies. We’re always right here, with you, in the now.

 

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to each and every one of you!